Hast Thou Considered The Tetrapod

Its been a long week of work and filming and am now in Auckland for the weekend filming a fashion show. Been in my hotel room for about half an hour and already I’m bored and over it. Never was one for hotels, the novelty of it wears off pretty quickly and by the end of it, your trying to figure out how get rid of the dead hooker. Typical.

Anyway, in other news, there’s word of a Preacher movie again, this time its ‘confirmed’ with Sam Mendes directing this time. The last I heard about this project, it was going to be an HBO series, but turns out it got dropped for being ‘too dark’ and ‘religiously controversial’, which is kind of the point right? Well anyway, I hope they don’t fuck it up, cause I friggin’ love Preacher with all of my body (including my pee pee).

The Mountain Goats have finally announced their return after postponing the Australian leg of their tour and breaking my heart. December 17th, I’m there and so should you.

Man, I’ve now had this tab open for so long and can’t think of anything more to write about. Not that you’d notice. I’ve been clicking between tabs and keep coming back to this window with the blinking icon saying “finish writing this post you lazy fuck. Stop ignoring your blog. Update use more often. We maybe annoying like a herpes sore, but we’re yours to deal with for the rest of your life”… okay… shit, I must be really tired. I’ve just written a whole paragraph of my train of thought and am now writing about me writing about writing my train of thought… wow… I’m actually confused now. Oh and if your reading this Ross, I forgot to return that library book and its up in Auckland with me. Will return it on Sunday. My bad.

I need to sleep.

A Random Turn of Events

Sweet Knights of Columbus, that’s right, I have a blog that needs to be updated regularly. So where have I been? Slipping obviously, but one particular recent event which was awesome and totally worth blogging was my recent Friday night…

After a day of nothing and being quite bored, I txt’d around to see who wanted to go out for a drink and by 5 o’clock had a small entourage of friends to chill out and drink some drinks with. Several bars down, we decide that the next place to go and be merry is the casino. Brilliant idea! Only thing is that my friends needed to go move a car first and I simply needed more booze in me, so going our separate ways, we planned to meet out in front of the casino in within a certain amount of time.

As I walked alone down the city street, a carload of young douchefags thought I was the right target for their douchefaggery and one of the morons in the backseat yelled out his window to me “Asian cunt!”.

Now, though there is no doubt I am an Asian and at times, according to some, a total cunt, I doubt either of these terms have anything to do with each other, let alone be called out by some retarded fucktard who’s parents were themselves to retarded to know how to use a goddamn condom.

So this idiot yells this out to me from the safety of his backseat, but lo to his misfortune, he yelled it at me of all Asians and their car had to stop two seconds later at a red light.

Brilliant.

I took one very pissed off and very drunk breath of air and proceeded to sprint towards the car at full speed with the hate of China behind my back.

Where there once sat an over confident, unaborted incest lovechild, now sat a pants wetting assclown who was beginning to realise his mistake and started rolling up his window in fear.

Drunk, and full of rage, I proceeded to open his door with the force of an asian cunt drunk and full of rage and yell the shit out of this total cuntrag who should have been a blowjob instead of the product of his mum accidently sitting down on the little turd ejaculate that came out his dad.

This ranting and yelling proceeded for a while until the lights turned green and then I set the little cock stain and his friends on their way, punctuating the encounter flipping the classic ‘bird’.

Now, many people, even people I’m close to and know, don’t really think that racism is prevalent in this day and age, or at least in New Zealand of all places. But let me tell you for the record, shit like that happens to me very often. Racial profiling and stereotyping has ranged from mild mean words like our retard example above, to real fucked up wankers, pressing me against a wall wanting to cause me grevious bodily harm just because of the colour of my skin.

Whoops… this post went on a bit of a tangent there and I don’t mean to start editorialising too much, but just for the record, I don’t stand for that shit. Not against me or any other human being. No one should be judged based on the colour of their skin and I’ll get in the face of anyone that thinks otherwise.

Now, don’t get me wrong though, I’ll hate the shit out of someone if they’re an asshole no matter what ethnicity or race or country their from. You could be a fellow Asian or a shining example of the Aryan race, but if you’re a total moron, you’re a total moron in my total morons book. Case close. But to get back down to basics, racism sure as shit don’t fly with me and neither does the hitting of women while we’re at it.

Anyway, Batman wannabe speech aside, where was I? Ah right, after my run in with the little fuck stick, I proceeded to drink more, meet up with my friends at the casino, win over 600 bucks, drink a bit more and wake up with one hell of a hangover in my car the next morning (cause I don’t drink drive damnit!).

Batman would be proud.

KazooKeylele?

Its like the horrible melding of a baby keyboard, ukulele and a kazoo. This guy plays a half decent version of The Final Countdown on it too…

…if your feeling masochistic enough. I mean, it still is The Final Countdown.

For Don Hertzfeldt Fans…

My new favourite picture of the week.

If you don’t know what this is referencing, you owe it to yourself to watch this. Or even better, go buy one of his DVDs at bitterfilms.com and bask in all its glory.

This picture was also found on my new favourite photo blog which just keeps updating constantly with some of the best and coolest images around. Find more greatness at https://riotclitshave.livejournal.com/

In Memorium… just to morbid things up today

“This world to her
Was like a tragic play
She came, saw, disliked,
And passed away.”

Hope your enjoying that great gig in the sky!

Why yes, it certainly has been quiet recently…

Time to step out of the shadows I suppose. Been doing stuff and mostly not achieving anything, but overall hanging out with mates.

There’s been more buying of stuff, which I believe is always good for the soul, though not for the wallet. But I must mention that a parcel of nine sweet Godard films is now five weeks overdue and I’ve come to the conclusion it’s probably not going to turn up anytime soon. That revelation is a bit of damper.

But overall, not a helluva lot has been going on. There’s been several birthdays which I’ve managed to almost forget all off. People have been coming and going and I can’t help but feel this is all just that calm before the storm. Hopefully by storm, I mean busload of strippers parks itself in my driveway, but we’ll see.

Stuff I should mention is that this week is the last week of Future Te Aroha’s production of Little Shop of Horrors. People I know are in it and made it so go check it out. Here’s the poster.


A video of a bar being served by a monkey. I don’t know what exactly this is, but it is quite possibly the greatest thing on the face of this earth ever ever.


Pictures of The Most Alien Looking Place on Earth. And I’d agree.

And the photo of the week that made me laugh…

Oh and I just noted that the counter is past 1000, but no one has claimed their prize yet. No rush either.

Dead Chris Week

Haven’t updated in a while and haven’t really had anything much to update on. Think I’m depressed again. Must make another film. Slow week.